Feedback: Are You Wearing Your Colour or Theirs?

“What, I need to give feedback based on the personality style (colour) of my employee - not the way I like to give it?”

💡That was the lightbulb moment for one of our workshop attendees recently. Suddenly, they realised why their feedback wasn’t landing - and what to do differently.

So we thought we’d share this with you too, because feedback is one of the most powerful tools we have as leaders. Done well, it drives motivation, engagement, innovation, and trust. Done poorly, it can do the opposite - leaving employees disengaged, demotivated, and even eroding confidence and trust in their leader.

A Personality Lens on Feedback

One area often overlooked in feedback training is the importance of adapting to the employee’s personality style (colour). Looking through this lens can completely change how feedback is received.

The truth is, there’s no single “right” way to give feedback. Its power lies in flexibility - shaping it so it’s meaningful for the person receiving it and effective for the situation.

Just as our personalities differ, so do our preferences for how feedback is delivered. Drawing on a form of DISC personality testing, with some added nuances, here's a high-level summary of the four personality style (colour) feedback preferences we use in our workshops and with our DIY card challenge:

🔴 Red (Results-driven, direct, competitive)

• Prefers feedback that is straightforward, actionable, and quick.

• Best when focused on goals, outcomes, and improvement.

🟡 Yellow (Enthusiastic, social, energetic)

• Thrives on feedback that is positive, conversational, and encouraging.

• Engages best when tied to ideas, creativity, or team contributions.

🔵 Blue (Analytical, cautious, detail-oriented)

• Values specific, fact-based, well-prepared feedback.

• Needs time to process and reflect.

🟢 Green (Supportive, caring, steady)

• Responds best to feedback that is gentle, personal, and affirming.

• Needs a safe, private environment with emphasis on trust.

⚠️ Remember: most people are a blend of colours. Also, preferences often can shift depending on the situation.

The Hardest Part: Wearing Their Colour

Most managers give feedback the way they like to receive it; it’s only natural. But effective feedback isn’t about your comfort zone - it’s about what resonates with your employee.

For example: I’m a mix of yellow and red. I love feedback that’s direct, results-focused, and delivered with energy. But if I give feedback in that style to someone who’s green/blue, it can feel harsh, rushed, or lacking detail, not landing well at all. So instead, I need to slow down, soften my tone, and provide more depth.

That’s the magic of colour-matching feedback!

Practical Tips for Leaders

So how do you put this into practice? Here are four tips to help make sure your feedback lands in the right way:

1. Ask first

Don’t assume - ask your employees how they prefer to receive feedback in various scenarios, such as recognition, performance discussions, or coaching. Write this down and keep it handy so you can consistently adapt your approach. You may be surprised by their answers, and it shows you care enough to ask.

2. Wear their colour, not yours

As previously mentioned, this is the golden rule. Deliver feedback in the style that resonates with your employee, not the way you would prefer to hear it. That might mean slowing down, giving more detail, softening your delivery, or, in other cases, being more direct and concise. The goal is to make the feedback meaningful for them, not easier for you.

3. Practise every colour

As with any skill, you need to practice it to master it. Rehearse delivering feedback in all four colour styles so you’re ready when the situation calls for it. For example, with our DIY feedback activity cards, we pair colour cards with scenario cards and role play different situations - an easy way to prepare yourself to flex beyond your comfort zone.

4. Stay flexible

Remember, people’s needs can shift depending on context. Someone who is usually high-energy and thrives on quick, positive feedback may prefer a slower, more thoughtful approach in a sensitive or high-stakes situation. Pay attention to the moment, and be ready to flex your style accordingly.

I hope you’ve found this useful - next time you’re giving feedback, pause, think about their colour, wear it, and see how differently it lands.

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If you’d like to learn more about our leadership development workshops or explore our DIY feedback activity cards, feel free to get in touch or visit our website. We’re here to help!