Starfish Moments: Making a Difference, One Person at a Time

Sometimes the simplest stories carry the most powerful lessons about leadership. And one of my favourites is the Starfish Story. It's a reminder that making a difference doesn't always require big initiatives or grand gestures. Sometimes, it's the smallest actions that have the greatest impact.

Here's how the story goes . .

A man is walking along a beach after a storm when he sees thousands of starfish washed up on the sand. Ahead of him, a child is picking them up one by one and throwing them back into the sea.

The man says, "There are thousands of starfish. You can't possibly make a difference."

The child picks up another starfish, throws it into the ocean and replies, "I made a difference to that one."

It's a simple story, but it captures something I think so many leaders get wrong. Which is that too often, leaders think too big. They want to improve engagement, build trust, create a better culture and develop their people. Faced with such big challenges, it's easy to feel overwhelmed.

But instead of asking, "How do I change everything?" perhaps we should ask, "Whose day can I make better today?"

Great leadership happens one moment at a time

Think about the leaders who've made the biggest difference to you. Chances are, you remember the small moments as much as the big ones.

The manager who believed in you before you believed in yourself. The leader who noticed you were struggling and asked if you were okay. The unexpected thank you. The conversation that gave you the confidence to try something new.

These are what I call Starfish Moments: small, intentional leadership actions that make a meaningful difference to one person. They probably won't appear in an annual report or transform engagement scores overnight. But they can change how someone feels about themselves, their work and their leader.

If you've heard me speak, you'll know I often encourage leaders to be MAD - Make A Difference. That's exactly what Starfish Moments are all about.

Where can you create a Starfish Moment?

When I think about our Great Boss Building Block Model™, I see opportunities everywhere, and here are a few examples from five of the leadership building blocks:

• Empathy & Compassion: Notice someone struggling and ask how you can help.

• Listening: Put your laptop away and give someone your full attention.

• Appreciation: Recognise a contribution others may have overlooked.

• Development: Give someone an opportunity to stretch themselves.

• Inspiration: Remind someone why their work matters and the difference they're making.

Most of these actions take minutes, sometimes just seconds. Yet their impact can last much longer.

Your Starfish Challenge

This week, don't try to change everything. Instead, look for opportunities to create a Starfish Moment. One conversation. One act of trust. One genuine thank you. One opportunity to encourage someone or help them feel seen, valued and capable.

Because great leadership isn't just about big initiatives or grand gestures. It's about the small, intentional actions that make a difference to the people we lead.

So, what are you waiting for? Get out there, find your starfish and be MAD - Make A Difference!